All of us have tremendous personal and professional strengths – with a few weaknesses sprinkled in along the way. It’s how we handle both that allows us to fulfill life’s potential with our unique talents or less so…

 It really starts with those six inches or so between our ears. Instead of spending 80 percent of our time trying to improve our strengths, most of us typically spend an unhealthy percentage trying to “scale Mt. Everest…”

One of my fantastic colleagues, Doug Lennick, highlighted some very enlightened research Kim Cameron, a professor at the University of Michigan, has completed.  Professor Cameron’s “Positive Leadership: Strategies for Extraordinary Performance” book, which I suggest all of you should read for professional and personal purposes, highlights many possible life-changing findings and breakthrough strategies.

Among them, are his four Ps – positive climate, positive relationships, positive communications and positive meanings.

Each one relates to how successful we see ourselves, and how others see us. This research definitely has synergy with my resiliency control and strengths models I’ve talked about many times before. That is, the three life actions we can truly control in our lives – our attitude, our values and how we relate to people.

Over the next few months, I will occasionally write articles about his four Ps as they relate to our career and life resiliency.

Let’s start out with focusing on our strengths to nurture positive (and resilient) relationships at work and in life.

As I mentioned, one of our life actions we can ultimately control is the way we treat others and the strengths we show. And this is where Professor Cameron’s “”Positive Relationships” of building energy networks and reinforcing strengths definitely come to the forefront 

As very conscientious individuals in work and in life, we want to feel great about ourselves without waiting for the next crisis to hit.

A study has shown that we can improve our strengths by up to 30 percent. If we use the same amount of time to improve their weaknesses, we can only get less than a 10 percent improvement rate.

I have found my greatest life and work success in the corporate world and life in general to focus on what I do best. I know that is easier said than done with expectations of others.

When I was asked a few years ago to create layoff communications plans that would affect my work friends – and ultimately me – the first draft was not seen as not “hard enough.”

I took the critique and used my resilient strengths of adaptability and patience to re-craft a more direct yet sensitive plan that was implemented.

The workplace and life point: Unless you lack some core skills, I suggest not worrying as much your weaknesses. Especially in your working world, I suggest spending at least 80 percent of the time demonstrating and improving your strengths. 

It also is much easier to keep focusing on your strengths if you have very resilient and positive energy networks (as Dr. Cameron highlights) around you. As far as your resilience, this means trying to avoid as much as possible those folks who may see the glass half empty and more than not, have reasons why something won’t work.

Sounds easier to say than do. By establishing, though, positive relationships with others, you can weed out those who are probably not healthy for you to stick around – unless absolutely necessary.

A fantastic business example has happened to me very recently as I have been overcoming some fairly significant health issues stemming from my lifelong physical disability (Cerebral Palsy).

To increase my resiliency programming reach around the world even more, I recently joined Lennick Aberman Group (LAG), a worldwide leader in corporate services for behavioral advice, emotional intelligence and moral intelligence – www.lennickaberman.com.

Unfortunately, right after joining, my highly arthritic back went nuts on me. I had several significant falls leaving me with concussions and being paralyzed for a short time.

My great friends at LAG, which is one of my positive energy networks, came through to say time after time “focus on yourself and don’t worry about anything at work…we are 100 percent behind you.” And they meant it!

In addition to my wonderful family and friends, such a positive energy network at work has allowed me to continue using my creative strengths with resiliency such as this article example. If I had a less compassionate and enthusiastic energy around me, my creativity would have been stalled because of worry (a weakness of mine) about what’s next.

As I have tried to do, I’d suggest that you redouble your efforts to establish further “energy networks” around you. You, then, can focus most of your efforts on making your life and work strengths even greater knowing there is such positive and resilient support around you. 

This will make you more content, your family happier, and show work colleagues your tremendous and unique strengths on all fronts. Such is managing those six inches the best way for you…J 

It’s such a resilient pleasure talking with you again this week. Please visit my web site for my latest resiliency e-books for your work and personal lives – www.resiliencyfirst.com. I hope you are having a resilient day!

Photo By: Spracks

Having a resilient plan to determine “What’s Next” in your life and career is doubly important these days as our world continues recovering from the economic recession of the last three years.

But looking at “What’s Next” should not be confined only to our challenging moments as an employee, co-worker, supervisor, parent or friend. More importantly, it should be focused on ourselves.

In good times, it is really easy to say we can adapt to nearly all future situations. We are running on all cylinders as we recently signed the deal with three new worldwide clients. That we are flying high after our spouses received a special surprise gift from us they loved. Or, we look in the mirror on a particular day and simply say to ourselves, “life is truly a blessing and I am making a valued difference in this world.”

In my 30+ year working career and 52-year life, I’ve humbly had countless successes and wonderful times like these. Like you, it’s not hard to hope such moments will keep on coming if we see ourselves as a person of character, and a very terrific and diligent parent or worker…

Then, a few not-so-terrific life issues happen, and our self-confidence becomes shaken. And even more serious ones rear their ugly head. You wonder: Will there be truly good times again and really what is next?

We may not get that deserved raise. Or, we were laid off because our companies are downsizing. Or, possibly, we can’t seem to have a meaningful conversation with our teenagers…join the club.:) Or, most seriously, our health takes a turn for the worse and we don’t know if life will ever be the same again.

I’ve been facing the last one recently with the effects of my physical disability going nuts. Falling nearly 10 times in the last month causing paralysis for a short time, stitches, bruises and a lot of scary “What’s Next” moments has got my attention.

While my self-confidence went into the tank for a short time, I found something inside myself that all of us should take to heart the next time life seemingly gets in the way.

I’m sure you’ve been there in some way…

I gathered myself and seriously asked, “What Do I Truly Want”? How was I going to get through such – for me – mountainous obstacles to get back to as close to “Steve normal” as possible? Then, a light bulb switched on: I started not to worry so much about what was but plans on what could be.

After talking with my doctors, family and friends, I developed/aligned a personal life plan going forward, looked at my personal brand very hard and thought about what Ghandi called “the change we want to make.”

Or, as my partners and good friends at Lennick Aberman Group, more succinctly highlight in the 4 Rs of behavior in life and at work:

► Recognize

► Reflect

► Reframe

► Respond

You can use this model in all your work or life challenges to figure out the best next steps for you. Check on our web site – www.lennickaberman.com – to see more about behavioral advice, emotional intelligence, moral intelligence, resiliency and much more.

Recognize: With my health, I had to recognize the resiliency and adaptability strategies I’ve always used to be very successful and happy in my life and work were not cutting it fully anymore. I had to find ways – more commitment to a cane and electric scooter, listening to doctors about possible surgeries, etc., which will enable me to stay in more control of my “What’s Next.”

Too often, each of us don’t give ourselves the opportunity to recognize what is really going on and our options in different situations. We are just too mad at others, ourselves or the world to recognize the next important steps to successfully move us past the bumps in our personal or professional roads.

Reflect: No matter how serious, reflect on the entire “event” and understand you can’t change the past. For me, it’s how I react to those less-than-perfect moments (like falling) that ultimately will determine my fate and self-confidence.

Reflecting doesn’t necessarily mean thinking that you could have done anything differently to change what’s happened – whether it is a mistake at work or a personal life challenge. My disability, for example, has its own mind. It’s what I do from this moment that will keep me walking well into my elderly years.

Reframe: I don’t look at this fairly serious health setback as only a negative. I have reframed the situation, and learned so much about myself and others as I stay patient with the recovery.

If you have one of those days, weeks or years, I suggest not relying on what others can do or “owe you.” Reframe to ask what you can do for yourself – not matter how challenging.

Responding: There are a lot of typical ways society has taught us on how to respond to good times and not. If something goes well, we of course should be humble and gracious. If something goes awry, we should be seen as “rolling up our sleeves” to overcome the obstacles.

While life and work are rarely that clear cut, I have responded to my health issues as Dr. Elizabeth Kubler-Ross’ grief model stages – Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression and Acceptance.

My acceptance, as you should think about the next time life/work grief appears on your doorstop, was about responding in the most productive way to move my health in a very resiliently positive direction That is, find the best solutions to “What’s Next” and never give up no matter the situation.

How will you respond to your next “true” crisis or challenge? I hope you will follow my example and the four Rs of our behavior to overcome and maintain your confidence for the long haul. 

As I did with my next steps, you definitely owe it to yourself…and your self-confidence.

Thanks, again, so much for being one of the millions worldwide who have visited my site – www.resiliencyfirst.com since 2009. Please take a look at my new work/life resiliency e-books for additional ways to overcome and be confident. 

Photo By: dewittrobinson 

 You are typically very resilient in your work and personal lives. You successfully adapt to most situations out of your control quite nicely. You persevere and persist better than many of us when inevitable challenges get in your way. You are patient and gentle with yourself even when you make professional or personal mistakes. 

Then, something in your life blindsides you to the point that shakes your inner-foundation. The core values and ideas you’ve lived by all your life get severely shaken without you having much say-so in the matter… 

So then where do you go from here?

You might have had a recent break up of a long-term and very dear relationship. After 20 years at the same company moving up the ranks, you are now seen as too expensive to be kept any longer. Your child just had a horrific accident playing a sporting event and she most likely will never walk again.

Being resilient, of course, does not mean you are not going to face possible life-changing challenges. Or, that your fine-tuned resilience that usually allows you to find your right footing suddenly is no where in sight – at least at first.

Many of you around the world have told me of some tragic events you’ve lived through and recovered the best you could. A reader in Europe taking care of his beloved mother, who was in the last stages of Alzheimer’s.  The gentleman from middle America who literally stayed in bed for six months because of his depression of not finding a job for more than a year. The woman from Middle East whose husband had not been seen for month’s because of his political dissent.

Then, there’s me. Known as the Doctor of Life Resiliency, I should be able to handle most any situation. Right? Folks like you look at me to offer an interesting opinion on successful resiliency strategies to get you through those work and life “moments.”

Yes, usually. But then about a month ago my Cerebral Palsy of a 52-year-old body started throwing (almost literally) “concussion grenades” at my walking and life independence. First, losing my balance and hitting a wall quite hard, then losing my balance crashing into a closet door at home hitting my head, next  losing my balance hitting my head against a wood shelf in my daughter’s room causing momentary paralysis and a lot of fear, and most recently smacking my head against a doctor’s linoleum floor causing many stitches in my forehead.

A month to remember and learn for sure.:) At least two concussions, and a lot to understand and assess for me. I don’t mention these things to gain your empathy. You may be dealing with a life moment even more complex than mine.

It’s how I’m trying to battle through the aftermath is something I hope you can take away when your life momentarily goes awry. 

I, firstly, felt extremely sorry for myself, and had many pity hours and days especially after the first couple of spills. This is when my family, friends and work colleagues reminded me consistently of what I should do next. Focus on a medical solution, don’t give up, and see yourself as one of my colleagues called me an “amazing man.”

I didn’t and haven’t given up or settled. That’s my thought for you when times become ridiculously tough with circumstances you cannot ultimately or even partially control.

While there is nothing wrong in using a wheelchair, this is not the moment in my life to sit down. These bad falls happened, but how can I find a way to reasonably make such falls less likely? Not eliminate falling. I have fallen all my life. Just make it less likely for serious falls and a lot of falls.

Doctors, potential back operations and recovery time are most likely in the near future. I, however, am not quitting the dream of walking comfortably for at least the next 25 years without having to rely on a chair 100% of the time.

The point is, and one I suggest you remember the next time the anvil falls on you, there is always a solution better than what you think. Not one that you have to settle for but one offering you the majority say in how you live personally or professionally.

 It can be done…

My recent physical challenges have forced me to think much more about focusing on me. Not just my career, family, friends and colleagues, but me. I used to just get up, dust myself off and try to forget about the fall. From the last month, I learned that if you don’t deal with yourself in the best way possible way, you can’t be as effective with your loved ones or colleagues at work. Sounds so basic, but many of us discount what certain actions/events ultimately mean to us. We are more worried about the short-term…

The all-mighty has shown me a different path that will make my life/career even better. Are you ready the next time “life” happens to you?

I know you can be…if you only believe you can.

I hope you are having a resilient day, and thanks for your continued readership and comments. I truly appreciate the conversation!

Photo By: Lasse Kristensen

Our attitudes about ourselves can mean the difference between being resiliently successful or staying in the “spinning mode” after you take a fall literally and figuratively at work/life.

Sounds like something your mother would say. Well, it probably was – and is. My mother, who is in her 80s, thinks and acts like someone in mid-life. And guess what? She is seen and acts like someone 40 years younger. I, then, know someone who is in her late 40s who thinks and acts like a person much older who thinks that there are not too many good days left.

Now, we all have our inevitable challenges and there are some days this 50 something feels like 80 – and sometimes 35. The difference, which is still being drilled into me by my dear mother and lovely wife, is that I should worry less about things out of my total control. My physical disability is a good example of how my resilient attitude can keep me grounded.

So, why do we doubt ourselves? Why do we let setbacks overly influence our future actions? Why do we let other people sometimes ruin our day? Why is it sometimes hard to dust ourselves off and get back in the game?

Well, for one thing, we are definitely not androids. Our confidence in ourselves sometimes wavers no matter if we are the most successful CEO in the world, or someone looking for their next great work adventure.

But, more succinctly, all of us have hopes, dreams and expectations for ourselves that are met many times in life. But then there are those moments you throw up your hands and wonder why…

More than not, our true resilient spirit depends on how we react to those few significant wavering moments allowing us to feel good about ourselves even during the most challenging moments. That is, our how are we “managing” our attitude…

A few examples I have mentioned in my talks and previous articles:

- You are about to close on this multi-million dollar account cementing your increased status at company XYZ. A friend finished a fantastic job interview that could not have gone any better that day. Another friend just completed a month-long work assignment feeling confident and refreshed. The three of you stop at the local pub and have a cool one to share the moment.

- You meet the next day with the client ready to sign the deal but unexpected complications come up possibly jeopardizing what you’ve worked so hard for.

- Your friend meets with his supervisors but doesn’t get the terrific response he thought about the project he just completed. He comes out of the meeting a bit mystified that a project potentially saving the company a lot of money was treated matter-of-factly

- Your other friend waits for the company to call for the next interview, which it said for sure would happen in a couple of days. She write a very gracious “thank you” e-mail to the interviewers but nothing happens that day…the next day…or three weeks out even after politely e-mailing them a second time for an update. Then, finally, they called back and said another candidate was a “better fit.” Her world comes crashing down…at least for the moment.

- Or, more personally for me recently, I had a couple bad falls where I could have let my attitude about myself and future go in the tank. But I kept believing and having a resilient attitude despite being paralyzed for a few minutes after snapping my head back falling into something. I got all my faculties back after a few minutes where my body went into shock. But it was my attitude that has allowed me to dust off and move forward.

At the office, most of us believe that – if we work hard enough – we are ultimately in control of our own fate. Partially, this is, of course, true. Hard work, determination, grit and adaptability will allow all of us to go far in our careers and lives.

It, however, is our attitude and resilience in those “not so great” moments in work and life that separates those who continue finding paths through the avalanche-ridden mountain passes of life.

So, the next time life/work does not treat you quite right, focus on your attitude to get your ship floating again. You’ll find, as I did, that you will stay more in control and be able to better manage your expectations just a bit better.

Sometimes mothers are right.:)

 Please stay strong my friends. Until next time, take care!

Photo By: syiqi

All of us, including our children, need to be highly resilient in today’s world. Adapting, finding common ground and sometimes persevering through actions of others not within our control are a few ways we do this nearly every day. Particularly, our children are facing the newest form of manipulation and harassment by others in schools and life…that is, cyber bullying.

Our homes have always been resilient sanctuaries where bullied kids could feel safe. Unfortunately, cyber bullying is starting to take that away from our kids, too. (Don’t throw up your hands. Check out 10 parenting tips on cyber-bullying later in this article.)

I knew when I came home from school in the late 60s or early 70s that I was protected from emotional bullying– at least until I walked the school halls the next day having to display my lifelong physical disability (Cerebral Palsy). Protected from the emotional bullying of:

- Being laughed at and called a lot of terrible names in elementary school.

- Being pelted with spitballs after a basketball game in junior high.

- Being told by a classmate not to date a particularly beautiful high school girl and stick with your own kind.

- Being ridiculed by a classmate for taking advanced classes in high school because your kind only does menial work anyway.

 At least I could shut the apartment door. Now, today, our advanced technologies don’t even allow our kids this safe haven.

Typical bullying that most of us experienced in some way growing up is, of course, still there.

Approximately half of US students are impacted by traditional bullying each school day. It happens on buses, in the cafeteria, gym, hallways, playground, and in classrooms. The most frequent form bullying takes is words (the emotions of teasing, taunting, ridiculing, name-calling, and gossip.)

This type of bullying happens in the “physical” world where there are limits.

Cyber-bullying is making school days even more painful for many of our children. This is where bullying has changed so dramatically.

Bullying in cyberspace is not bound by school hours, school days, or facing the intended bully victim. Unfortunately, the perceived anonymous nature of the Internet often insulates the bully from the consequences of their damaging behavior.

I saw a recent TV commercial that really hit home as I have a 16-year-old teenage girl treading through the sometimes challenging emotions of high school. She’s a really good kid like yours. But even good kids are not immune from hurt or hate… 

The commercial shows someone writing an extremely hurtful remark on a social media site describing a particular girl using the “s___” word. The girl comes to high school the next day finding hundreds of posters tacked on the walls with her photo, name and, “You are a “s___.” She is crushed…

An extreme and horrific example, for sure… But not one out of the realm of possibilities given the “anonymous” nature of the web.

As the number of households with Internet access approaches saturation and cell phone ownership expands to the 100 million mark, so do the ways kids bully each other.

Cyber bullying in the form of text messages, emails, photos, website postings can go school-wide in minutes and global in days.

Slanderous information sent out into cyberspace is difficult, if not impossible, to erase. Cyber bullying often takes the form of cyber gossip, where damaging content is based on whim; not facts, and is posted on social networking sites. 

I sometimes cried myself to sleep just wanting to “belong” with the other kids – especially in elementary school. That is, until I learned to stand up to them with most moving to easier victims.

Now, cyber bullying is an even more frightening way to rarely feel safe from the emotional torment. It is so sadfully leading to increased teen suicides and unbearable despair for kids, parents and schools.


Cyber Bullying Getting Bigger: Studies indicate that cyber bullying incidents have at least quadrupled. A 2000 survey reported 6% of young people had experienced some form of cyber bullying.

In 2005, studies of 1500 Internet-using adolescents found that over one-third had been cyber bulled and half of those admitted to cyber bullying others. Another 2005 study revealed that 20% had been cyber-bullying victims.

A 2004 survey of 1556 adolescents also found that 42% had been bullied online. That’s 2004. Inevitably, today, that percentage has most likely gone much higher.

There are so many web outlets and phone outlets for cyber bullying to be generated, including:

- Text or digital imaging messages sent on cell phones

- E-mails

- Instant messaging

- Web pages

- Blogs

- Chat rooms or discussion groups

- Other information communication technologies


Cyber-bullying Perpetrators – It Is A Cycle:

 - A study: Middle school and high school girls were about twice as likely as boys to display cyber-bullying behaviors in the form of email, text, and chat.

- Middle school and high school girls were twice as likely as boys to report receiving email, text messages or chat room messages that teased, taunted, and ridiculed. 

- 62% said that they had been cyber-bullied by another student at school, and 46% had been cyber-bullied by a friend.

- 55% didn’t know who had cyber-bullied them.

 Only 20% of cyber-bullying victims tell their parents about the incident. Victims are most likely to tell a friend (42%).

Our daughter actually mentioned that she and her friends have received photo “requests” on Facebook, etc. Really scary stuff…

Ten Tips: Parents Cyber-Bullying Preemption:

- Consider installing filtering and blocking software, but understand clearly that proactive parents are the only real deterrent and the best resource for bullying preemption. 

- Keep your home computer(s) in easily viewable places, such as a family room or kitchen. 

- Model the behavior you want to see in your child.

- Talk regularly with your child about on-line activities he or she is involved in.

- Set firm guidelines for cell phone use and monitor that behavior.

 - Talk specifically about cyber-bullying. Explain that that it is harmful and unacceptable behavior.

- Outline your expectations for responsible online behavior and clearly explain the consequences for inappropriate behavior

- Encourage your child to tell you immediately if he or she is a victim of cyber-bullying. Tell your child does not respond to the bully.

- Stay calm. Plan in advance how you will calmly receive the news that your child is being bullied and the solution steps you will take. You will want the evidence. Tell your child to save the bullying messages or photo(s).

- Call your child’s school. Ask the principal what measurable, bullying preemption, activity-based programs they have in place today. Offer to serve on the group that expands the school’s behavior policy to include cyber-bullying behavior that disrupts the schools teaching and learning environment. Ask about results. 

Even with cyber bullying, though, parents and schools are only a part of the answer. As I have discussed in previous articles and discussions worldwide, the anti-bullying key I found is to increase our children’s self-confidence and esteem to where they can stand up to the bullies. It might mean a punch in the nose but most of the bullies will find someone more easily victimized and vulnerable.

This starts with parents showing confidence in their children and not trying to solve everything for them. My parents, who were extremely compassionate, caring and always there when needed, also allowed me to fall figuratively and literally. 

I did not rely that they were going to solve all the bullying incidents, which ultimately made me “tougher” to eventually handle most of them myself. Being tough doesn’t necessarily mean your child has to “bulk up.” Tough, for example, is showing – at least outwardly – that whatever is said is not that big of deal.

While cyber bullying is a newer and very hurtful form of hate, it is still about trying to take your child’s power and control away from themselves. Solving such issues is not always easy and straight-forward, but finding ways to overcome may help your children believe in themselves and not always see themselves as victims – now and in the future. 

It has certainly done this for me, and I know it can for your child(ren).

I hope you are having a very resilient day! Thanks, again, for your continued interest and readership, and please check out my resiliency e-books at www.resiliencyfirst.com.

 Photo By: Gusbodr.

This year has been a tough one for me physically, but my “sweet spot” has been talking with so many of you about work and life resiliency. I suggest in the New Year to step back and think through my three Ps of resilience in finding your sweet spot(s) in your life next year. Perseverance, Persistence and Patience. 

In doing this, please take a look at my new resiliency e-books on finding happiness, understanding your personal brand, and seeing yourself in the best light. Please click www.resiliencyfirst.com for more info.

Stay Resilient and have a Happy New Year!!!

Seeing a child’s smile creates as much pleasure as 2,000 chocolate bars—or $25,000 in cash. That was the finding of a British study by Hewlett Packard, using an electromagnetic brain scan machine and heart rate monitor to measure “the mood-boosting value” of various stimuli. 



The study found seeing a loved one’s smile was worth 600 chocolate treats or about $13,000. The lesson: Show some teeth and you’ll be much happier.:)

My newest resiliency e-books will also bring a smile to your face. Please check them out at my web site – www.resiliencyfirst.com.

Photo By:  by carf.

As I continue to recover from nasty falls recently because of my Cerebral Palsy challenges, a wonderful colleague T.A. (Tommy) Watson shows all of us what true inner-resilience is all about during this special holiday season. Also, please check out my web site (www.resiliencyfirst.com) for my latest resiliency e-books and article and enjoy Tommy’s story below.

By Tommy A. Watson, Ed. D. (Candidate), A.K.A. “Dr. Inspiration”

What do the terms at-risk and at-resilient, a term coined by Tommy A. Watson, actually mean? I am glad that you asked:

– At-Risk: describes an individual or group expected to surrender (give in) to adverse situation.

– At-Resilience: describes an individual or group expected to adapt (overcome) successfully to adverse situations.

Resilience, it may be the key skill for surviving and thriving in the multitude of changes we are all facing. I would like to share with you my story of resilience and offer some tips on what individuals can do to become more resilient during these turbulent times.

I arrived in Minnesota to play Big Ten football for the University of Minnesota after living in nearly 25 different locations during my childhood. My parents were heroin addicts and professional shoplifters.

As a result of their behaviors, I lived in 3 different foster homes, 3 different motel rooms, 3 different crisis centers, lived with my grandmother 3 times, my parents had gone to prison 3 times, and attended numerous schools, all by the time I was in 3^rd grade. As a 3^rd grader, I found myself angry, yearning to join and lead the local gang, and living with my aunt.

By the time I was in 7^th grade, my family and I got evicted from our home in front of the neighbor and my friends, who sat on their porches laughing as the local sheriffs tossed everything we owned into the front yard of the house, including myself and my siblings. From there, we (9 of us) moved back into a 10 X 16 motel room- where we would remain for the next year.

As my senior year of high school rolled around, I found myself homeless and sleeping on the floor of a family friend, while being recruited as the top high school football player in the state of Colorado.

Fast forward a year to my arrival to the University of MN, both my mom and dad were in prison, my younger brother was in prison, my grandmother (last legal guardian) was in a nursing home, my oldest sister was on the streets of Denver addicted to crack cocaine, my oldest brother was on the streets of Denver involved heavily in gangs, my second oldest sister was in foster care in Iowa, and my youngest sister was living with my aunt. Between my junior and senior year of high school, I lived in five different locations.

Today, I am an award winning author, renowned speaker, beloved former school principal, and CEO/Founder of T. A. Watson Speaking Coaching & Consulting. I have earned a Bachelor’s Degree, a Master’s Degree, an Advanced Graduate Degree, and I am currently completing my Doctor of Education in Leadership.

So how does a person endure all of this and come out standing? I am glad that you asked. Here are the things that I and others, who have endured challenging times, had to do:

1. Build Positive Beliefs in Your Abilities

2. Find a Sense of Purpose in Your Life

3. Develop a Strong Social Network

4. Embrace Change

5. Be Optimistic

6. Nurture Yourself

7. Develop Your Problem-Solving Skills

8. Establish Goals

 Ancient scripture says, that as a man [or woman] thinks so than is he. At-Risk or At-Resilient: Which one will YOU make the CHOICE to be?

Tommy A. Watson, Ed. D. (candidate), is and author (A Face of Courage- The Tommy Watson Story) and motivational speaker. For more information you can visit his website at: www.tawatson.com .

Photo By: BergerBunch

I’ve been working through some unexpected physical challenges in the last few days and won’t be writing a new column this week. Everything is cool and my life is on the resilient mend.:) 

I will be writing a Happy Holidays piece next week and want to leave you with a quote to ponder:

“It’s not that we can avoid life challenges and mistakes. They sometimes spring up unexpectedly when we least expect. It is how we react and successfully get through them that shows our true spirit, character and grit,” Steve Beseke.

As all of us grind to find those last holiday gifts, please remember the smiling faces when the packages are opened. All your efforts will then be rewarded many times over…

Please, again, check out my newest resiliency e-book, “Liking Yourself and Being Happy Even When Your Boss or Spouse Gives You That Chilling Stare,” at my award-nominated web site – www.resiliencyfirst.com.

Photo By: lisaluvz.

Trying to increase your work performance and stay happy and fulfilled at the same time. Trying to stay cool as your drama daughter or king leaves the headlights on and the car battery goes dead. Trying to stop from going nuts when your boss says she needs the report tomorrow instead of two weeks from now as originally communicated.

All of us have had those unique moments where maintaining our work/life happiness and sanity seem far away in a distant galaxy. This is when dealing effectively with your resilience and the stresses of life are most needed. Download Steve’s latest resiliency e-book on attaining work/life happiness consistently – AND find that quiet corner to relax…